I guess its true. I seek peoples respect, and I strive to be the nicest person that I can manage to be. One decision that has helped me to achieve this is to not sweat the small stuff. I don't allow myself to get upset unless it is really really important that I do. My thought process is very third year econ student oriented. Does the benefit of the outcome of me getting upset outweigh the negative impact that it will have on others, including the person that I am mad at? The answer, the majority of the time, is "No".
There is two reasons for this. One, the outcome of getting upset is usually either negative or none. Most often, when someone gets upset and makes a big deal out of something, everyone ends up with hurt feelings, and nobody feels better about the outcome. Usually, only the person who won the fight or argument feels good about the encounter. It is very rare that negativity and negative energy leave people feeling good. As far as trying to correct peoples bad behavior, the same holds true. People who are wrong, stupid, insensitive, prejudiced, and your plain old, run of the mill morons are going to continue to be so, probably for the rest of their lives. Just because you are indignant or correct them doesn't mean that they are going to change that.
The second reason is that, not only is the gain usually minor or nonexistent, but the costs can be devastating. Too often I hear about people who are good friends, getting into an argument about something that is trivial, and ending up with hurt feelings. There was never any intent to insult or upset, but it happens anyway. Someone allows it to become a big deal. Its because people forget that being right is less important than a friendship. Again, getting upset and making a big deal out of something is usually just going to cause hurt feelings.I do admit that there are occasions where it is appropriate to speak out, to get upset. Indeed, there are times when you have to. Justice and liberty are principles that hold our society together. The people in that society are the protectors of those liberties. So, when people are being abusive, or taking away the rights of another, it is more than appropriate to speak up and put someone in their place. We just have to be careful how we approach situations where someone is out of line, and be careful that we don't end up finding ourselves out of line.
Case in point, a couple days ago, I was reading through blogs, one of which is written by a friend of mine. I found a second, with a similar title and theme. In one of the posts on the second blog, I was shocked to find that the author had made the audacious claim that he was the author of both blogs and that one was really his experiences, and the other was a work of fiction. I was outraged at such a claim, thinking that my friend was the victim of some sort of plagiarism. I quickly sent him an email, telling him of my findings, and advising him to take strong action. In my mind, the plagiarist was cheapening my friend's experiences, by claiming them to be his own. After hastily and hotly writing this email, I discovered that my friend not only knew about the "offending" blog, but the post in question was an April Fools joke, perpetrated in collaboration by the two bloggers (who are also friends).
In conclusion, I try to remember that there are very few things that are important in this world. Our families, friends, and our freedoms are worth fighting for. But its most likely that opinions on global warming, the appearance of a neighbors lawn, or the words that someone chooses poorly are not going to be the important battles that you think they will be in the heat of the moment. If you really do feel it is important to say something, to express your frustrated opinion, then do what I do. Write a strongly worded letter. Just think it over really thoroughly before you send it.
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